How to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they will slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in".

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addiction, switch to espresso.

6. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy".

7. Don't use any punctuation.

8. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

9. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

10. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

11. Sing along at the opera.

12. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

13. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

14. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

15. Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, rock bottom.

16. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won! I won!"

17. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!!"

18. And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity... Send me ways you maintain your own.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

Hope you maintain your insanity this season so that happiness shall be untarnished with the worries of the world!

Happiness is your choice... Hope you choose the right thing!

See you next year... Gotta sign off for the Holidays.

GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!