Choices

When people ask me to define love, I say, "Love is like handing someone a gun, having them point it at your heart, and trusting them to never pull the trigger." (Sponge Bob)

When they ask me why I laugh at my mistakes and even write them with pride in my blogs, I say, "I'm not crazy. I just don't give a damn!" (Daffy Duck)

When one time I was conducting a group activity, a student asked what road sign I love the most, I said, "I like dead end signs. I think they're kind. They at least have the decency to let you know you're going nowhere…" (Bugs Bunny)

And when for the nth time a friend would ask me what do I get from writing, I'm not even sure if there are good old souls out there visiting my site, I just smile and say, "Kung gusto mong maging manunulat, eh di magsulat ka. Simple." (Bob Ong)

And last night when Eva said she wants to quit from her work because nobody believes in her, her boss got mad at her, she doesn't even have friends at her agency, and she's crying like hell, I said, "Either you stay to prove your worth or you quit and just show them you're a loser, you have to strive for your happiness." (MY original)

My CHOICES: I remained believing in love. I continued spicing up my mistakes and rewriting my life, accepting failure but keep on dreaming until words would fade into thin air.

Jan 9, 2008

The Blogger Is In

Oh hi everyone!

Happy New Year!!!

Was I late for the greeting?

Geeezzzz… it has been three weeks since I last posted an entry. And damn you’re right, I missed blogging. But I am in so far so good state of being me because the times I didn’t blog, I spent with my kids.

You remember I wrote about Gabrielle who was almost hospitalized because of pneumonia? Oh well, she was sick during the holidays. You can just imagine how awful she looked like when she started throwing up all her food intake on Christmas day and the following day had loose anal excretions. She was pale and lost really a lot of weight. We brought her back to her pedia and she suggested we bring her to the hospital. But we begged not to. She gave us another two days. Her vomiting stopped but her bowel is still loose. Her pedia can’t increase the dosage of her medication because she was too young and she can’t give her another prescription because of her G6PD deficiency. Medications for such are very limited because there are certain chemicals that are not recommended due to adverse reactions to her system. So she just extended her medication.

Fortunately, the drug cured her. Now, she’s back to being such an active kid. Thank God.

But I was really so worried during the holidays.

It all started with the pneumonia stuff and when I attended the Christmas Party in my Graduate School. Let me relate the spooky story that triggered the hell out of me…

Since it is a Christmas Party, I thought of dropping by the cake store to buy some goodies for my thesis adviser. While my friend and I are on my way to the venue, we met my adviser and we headed towards the graduate college building. Before reaching the entrance, Dr. Neroza stopped and seemed like looking for something/someone. Then she said, “Now where is that little girl you are with?”, looking at me questioningly.

Ate Weng and I said that we were not with a kid. It was just the two of us who approached her.

But she insisted, “No, you are with a little girl about this tall (gesturing beside my hip) and was in pink spaghetti strap blouse and was walking right beside you. I even looked at her for a moment because she was so cute and she smiled at me.”

Oh, hey… I can’t describe my feeling that time. I had goose bumps all over me and I started to melt like a candle. My knees are quivering and I can feel my body like cold ice. I was pale.

I remembered Gabrielle who is still not feeling well that day but seemed okay. Her diaper leaked when we woke up so I changed her nappies and clothes to a pink spaghetti strapped dress.

My friends prayed over me and bid me to go home. I ran through the bus like I was chased by dozens of demons. And when I reached home and saw my little angel smiling back at me, I exhaled the demons out of me.

A dear friend told me that maybe, Gaby had an astral journey. She wanted me beside her so she traveled along with me so she is with me everywhere I went. So right after school was over for the holidays, I promised myself to stop and focus all my attention to my kids.

Hey, I wasn’t a believer of such premonitions and astral journeys, but I guess the experience taught me one great lesson. And now, I am starting to enjoy reading books on the topic, too. Coincidentally, Coelho’s book which I am currently reading entitled Veronika Decides to Die, Zedka, one of the characters, experienced astral journey. Her soul leaves her body for a while and travels else where – where she wants to go. She had learned too the techniques of separating her soul from her body and have astral travel.

Oh well, I would relate the story in another entry. But for the meantime, I want to say: The Blogger is in!



1 comment:

PlanetMars said...

Spooky! I am so glad that your kids are okay.